I took these photos of my two favorite littles back in August, and kept meaning to share them, but things got real real quick y'all.
A couple weeks ago, I was totally beat. I was like, here I am, halfway through my master's program, hoping that a second wind would kick in soon. I was counting down the days until Christmas break (which I totally still am, but because HELLO, Christmas is the best).
Almost every day, I was finding myself immersed in thoughts like:
I'm too old to still be in college. I need to have started retirement fogoodnessake.
I want to be a mom already--I could be cuddling a squishy little instead of trying learn to differentiate between the Greek tenses.
What am I even doing here? Who would want me as their pastor? Who am I to lead? What if I was never even "called"?
But isn't that kind of the point?
Don't most of us spend our entire lives pursuing the things we believe we were meant to live out...all the while fearful that we won't be good enough when it comes down to it? That when it comes time to step into that role, we will fail colossally? Because who am I? What makes me worthy? What about me is special?
But when I'm honest with myself--when I am intentional about creating space to quiet my heart and be still and listen... I know I'm where I need to be. I'm pursuing what I need to pursue. This is my path. And yeah, sometimes its pretty tough, but this is the life-giving kind of hard. It's the kind of exhausting you feel after pouring all you’ve got into a really great workout, or giving all you have doing a full day’s work at your dream job—this is the rewarding kind of strenuous. This isn’t draining or wearying. This is worthwhile.